Got home just a short while ago from electrolysis. While I attempt to reduce the swelling up around my eyes (hoo boy, do the little whiskers in that area put up a fight!), I thought I would share a light moment from the session.
My regular electrologist, M, underwent surgery several weeks ago (and is doing very well - please send good vibes her way!).
While discussing M's convalescence, J and I remarked on how the Boston area is renowned for its world-class hospitals and facilities - and quite rightly so.
That does not mean, however, that the occasional error doesn't take place.
I reminded J of George Carlin's famous joke about surgeons: "Somewhere out there is the world's worst surgeon - and someone has an appointment with them tomorrow morning!"
I went on to tell her about some fairly routine surgery on my right foot that I underwent six or seven years ago in Seattle. It was in-patient surgery, although it would require me to be in a cast and on crutches for what turned out to be nearly two months.
After numbing the foot and giving me something to help with the pain, I lay back on the table, idly staring at the ceiling as we waited for the anesthetic to take effect.
Suddenly I felt a slight pressure on my right foot. I looked up to see a nurse capping a marker.
I asked her what it was for.
"Oh, we put an X on the proper foot - so we're sure we're operating on the right one."
J laughed when I joked that I wasn't sure if that was reassuring, terrifying, or both.
After a moment, another thought occurred to me.
"All I can say is that if anyone comes up to me with a Magic Marker before I go in for *my* surgery, I am SO out of there!"
We had to stop for several minutes because we were both laughing so hard!
***
A few theme-appropriate tunes - all in keeping with the high standards of decorum and class with which this blog has come to be known.
Or not. ;c)
First up, an early classic from Genesis from WAY back, when Peter Gabriel was their frontman:
Next up: Bryan Adams. His records still hold up quite well (imho):
And finally, Rod Stewart more than does justice to a gem from Cat Stevens:
Say what you will about the ease with which Rod chose to squander his colossal gifts; the man was one of the best interpretive singers in rock history.
(While it doesn't fit the otherwise light-hearted tone of this post, I would be remiss if I didn't share his remarkable cover of Robbie Robertson's deeply moving "Broken Arrow":
The meaning of these lyrics eluded me for years. When I finally realized what it was about, I was even more in awe of Robbie Robertson's masterful songwriting.
7 comments:
Dear Cass,
I would only worry if they write instructions for the doctor on your inner thigh....cut along dotted line....
Now about your musical choices....well I prefer a younger Robbie Robertson
http://youtu.be/hMRG5kjzMcU
Cass,
Not wanting to lower the tone :-) but if you get the same image I get before paying the Bryan Adams video then you couldn't have picked a better and more appropriate one, the thing just jutting into the frame on the left hand side, well ...
I like Rod Stewart a lot more in recent years with some of the material that he's done.
Ummm...markers aren't always so bad. I posted here about just such an event: http://goodbadblonde.blogspot.com/2012/02/under-knife.html
I kid you not the man had a bucket, and i do mean a bucket, of them. But he was using them to map out exactly what he wanted to do the day of the surgery so as not loose his spots.
The results? Spectacular! So I cannot say all markers are bad. Well, okay there was one down side. It took a week for all that stuff to wash off. :P
just so long as they don't do a "connect-the-dots" kinda thing, i think you'll be okay! :)
I'm so pleased that all of my ops were when I was much younger and they tried to make sure that you saw nothing of the OR!
Stace
@ April & bashashhazbaz:
Couldn't agree more!
Along those lines, other things I I fervently hope *not* to hear:
a): "Oops."
b) "Anyone know what this thing is?"
c) "Someone pick that up; we may need it lat - oh wait... never mind."
@ Jenna: This seems like perfect time to bring up the whole decorum aspect again. lol Yes, I see what you mean about the Bryan Adams video! Who knew? In terms of Rod, I still listen to his first four regularly. All are superb, and Atlantic Crossing, A Night on the Town, and Tonight I'm Yours are all first-rate too.
Also, I've mentioned that this blog is a mandatory white-gloves zone, correct? Just checking....
@ Kelli:
If/when I have *that* particular surgery, yes, I will bring my own markers just to be TOTALLY sure. :c) And as for the *other* surgery... well, washing it off afterwards won't be an issue this time!
@ Stace:
I had major eye surgery when I was four or five, and have very hazy memories of the OR. I've had several in-patient surgeries since them; I'm OK, provided I don't make the slightest attempt to look up at any point. I learned this the hard way. :c)
Hugs,
Cass
Sorry for all of the typos in my previous post! May be time to see if I can subcontract for some of Kelli's monkeys...
== Cass
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