Of Ghosts, Posts, Baristas, and Crossing the Finish Line

Yes, a second post today. I wasn't planning on writing this one, but I wanted to commemorate a moment that's been 15 years in the making... and a conversation with a barista who went above and beyond.

First, I want to acknowledge a huge debt of gratitude to three people without whom this moment would not have occurred. I don't think I could have written it without their love and support, even when I wasn't really offering much progress in return. Words hardly seems sufficient... but, here is a huge thank you. ❤️

This moment commemorates the completion of a blog post I've been working on for the past three weeks. It's all done, minus a few minor gaps that need to be dashed off, probably in an hour or two of writing. It's the final piece of the autobiographical series of posts I called The Chronicles of Cass. 

I wrote nearly 25 pages on Saturday, and over 40 pages today (all by hand - that was how I wrote the entire post, ~ 100 pages total). I was determined, once I started, that I was going to finish this once and for all, and do it today. And I did. 

I wrote it all in one five hour session at a Starbucks down the street from my friend F, where I'm staying for the moment. I only stopped once, when one of the baristas came over and quietly put a fresh iced coffee on my table. I hadn't touched the one I'd purchased three-plus hours before. I thanked her and offered to pay, but she shook her head.

"Whatever you're working on must be pretty intense," she said, adding, "It's none of my business, of course."

"It''s OK," I told her. "It is intense. It's for my blog. It's something I should've written a long time ago."

"It must be important. You like you've seen a ghost, to be honest," she said.

I had to laugh a bit.

"I guess I have," I said. "I'll probably write a post about this conversation, if that's OK with you."

It was. 🙂 So, one more thank you to C, the friendly barista who knew just what I needed at that moment.

I plan to start typing up this massive post tonight... if I don't fall asleep first. Ghosts can have that effect on you, I guess, especially once you're ready to bid them adieu.

***

A few songs about spirits to round up this post. First, a lovely song from The Psychedelic Furs, from their classic Mirror Moves album - "The Ghost In You":

Robyn Hitchcock, a personal favorite of yours truly, does a terrific cover:

Speaking of personal favorites, here's one from the Indigo Girls. This is a song from Rites of Passage, called "Ghost." 

That does it for this one. Until next time, then...

As I Was Saying…

<Tap tap > Hello? Is this thing on?

Well howdy there, Internet people (to quote Belle of the Ranch, one of my favorite YouTubers). Where the hell have you all been?

Just kidding. 🙂 I cannot believe my last post was nearly five years ago. So much has happened, both not-so-good and good, that I scarcely know where to begin. This post, then, is simply to get the ball rolling.

I have a long list of future posts, the result of a furious two weeks of writing (so far, with more on the way) to begin to make up for five years of radio silence. I have a particular order in which I want to publish them, but inspiration struck regarding these topics, and I've learned to obey the muse when she appears.

I'll preface by emphasizing up front that I'm okay after emerging from the darkest period of my life. That will be subject of my next post, but I wanted to be clear: I'm safe, and am taking steps to address long-standing issues in my life once and for all. I have a long way to go, but I'm determined to confront and deal with them once and for all. I'm off to a very good start, thanks to the help of my sister, my nephew, my mother, and my amazing friends. I would also like to thank the doctors, nurses, and emergency personnel who demonstrated heroic levels of care and lent a sympathetic, non-judgemental ear when that was what was called for. I would not be here without them. I can never truly repay them for their kindness. Love you all, and I'll do my level best to be the person you make me want to be.

***

If you or a loved one needs help, the Suicide and Crisis Hotline is available 24/7 here in the US by calling or texting 988. You can also visit the Samaritans 24/7 Helpline at samaritanshope.org. You are not alone.

***

I don't have any decent, semi-recent selfies to share, but I have something better: my sister's pup Cooper. Here he is giving her the side-eye for not showering him with what he deems is a sufficient number of treats:

And here he is post-treat chow-down. As you can see, you always know what he's thinking, good or bad 🙂:

***

Some things never change, including me ending with several (hopefully) appropriate songs to wrap things up, starting with Julie Miller's lovely "By Way of Sorrow":

Next up is Victoria Williams with "You Are Loved":

One from The Kinks, one of my favorite bands, with "State of Confusion":

And last but not least, one from the soundtrack to Before Sunrise, one of my all-time favorite movies - Kathy McCarty's lovely cover of Daniel Johnston's "Living Life":

Stay tuned for more posts in the very near future. Just gotta type them all up (I wrote them all by hand). Watch this space!

Thank You

This video is a small gesture of appreciation and gratitude for everyone who has reached out today after reading my most recent post. You have helped make an awful few days more bearable.

I hope to respond individually over the next few days... but for now, I hope this conveys how grateful I am to have all of you in my life. Thank you all. I love you.

A Mega-Whoa Moment

I have a whole mess of posts I need to write, in various stages of (in)completion.

And I am making progress, slowly but surely.

In fact, I hope to knock out at least one more before the long weekend ends.

But I need to write about my latest, and possibly biggest, "whoa" moment first. :c)

Read more »

Blues Power

Happy Boxing Day, everyone!

Still under the weather, but definitely better than yesterday.  Thank you to everyone who checked in the past few days. It meant a lot. :c) And what better way to get over the post-Christmas lethargy, whether flu- or tryptophan-induced, than with some primo Texas blues?

Read more »

Made It!/Christmas Quiz

I am on vacation.

:c)

I completed my tasks for the week (other than some minor cleanup work on a file I need to finish sometime over the weekend) and left for home just shy of 4:30.

It was such a weight off my shoulders that I didn't even mind that it took me an hour, rather than the customary 20 minutes.

Thank you again to everyone who commented and called and texted and listened this week. I would not have made it without all of you. I feel quite fortunate.

***

Although it's technically vacation time, I'm afraid there's one last quiz we all have to take.

Ready?

Is the best kind of Christmas:

a) A Maudlin Christmas (Sammy Maudlin, that is)?

b) A Bob & Doug Christmas?

c) Or a Liberace Christmas?

Oh, heck, I can't pick; they all crack me up! :c)