On The DL...

That's "Disabled List," in this case, not "Down Low." Although you probably guessed as much if you've read some of my earlier posts. No doubt by now you've deduced that I'm a bit of a klutz.

OK, more than a bit. :c) In no particular order, I've done the following:

Fractured my right ankle

Sprained both ankles

Broken my right foot (twice)

Dislocated my right wrist

Broken my right wrist (twice)

Fractured my elbow

Broken my right index finger

Broken an assortment of toes

I've also needed stitches on two occasions:

I was hit in the face with a baseball. This is when I found out I'm near-sighted. *Really, really* near-sighted. (I had two black eyes for weeks afterwards.)

I picked up a baseball bat from my bedroom floor and hit the light fixture in my bedroom (don't ask how; *I* don't know how I did it), Naturally, the biggest glass shard took a chunk out of my left hand. (I still have the scar to prove it.)

How do you know you're unusually clumsy? When you're on a first-name basis with the nurses at the emergency room. And I only wish I was joking. :c)

My sister C is an emergency room nurse now, no doubt inspired by the countless hours my family spent in the ER while I was being treated for my latest mishap. As I mentioned, I just got a new job that will necessitate me moving back near my hometown. She joked that if I got hurt now I could simply come visit her, which turned out to be the jinx I most definitely did NOT need.

I had just come back from a fun evening hanging out with friends last night, watching a documentary about the recording of Bruce Springsteen's Born To Run album (highly recommended, btw.). My friend M dropped me off outside my parents house around 12:30 AM. 

As it turns out, the city had recently repaved the street, which necessitated them raising the curbs by about a foot. Unfortunately, I figured this out when I tripped on said curb and came down heavily on my left side, driving my left elbow into my rib cage.

I have a pretty high pain threshold - I played baseball on my fractured ankle for two hours, for instance - but this was on a level with having my ingrown toenail treated years ago. I literally saw stars. 

I managed to stagger up the stairs and after fumbling with my keys, tried to unlock the door. The lock seemed to move further away each time I reached out for it. I had to rest my head on the storm door to stop everything from spinning.

Fortunately, my sister and nephew (her son) were in the living room and heard me. My nephew came over and opened the door after a minute or so. He immediately called to my sister to come help him get me inside. She told me later that she immediately knew something was wrong simply from the expression on my face. (Also, "you were trying to unlock the door with your nail clippers," as my nephew noted.)

He helped me to the couch while my sister ran to get some ice packs. I could barely breathe by this point; my left side felt as if it was on fire with every breath. We managed to lift my shirt up as she gently felt around my left side, looking for any signs of bruising. 

Her unofficial diagnosis: at a minimum I badly bruised my ribs, and may well have broken several. Apparently they really can't do much for it beyond giving you Motrin and ice packs, so that's what she did before I hobbled off to the couch in the back room where I've been sleeping.

I had an uncomfortable sleepless night, needless to say, as even the slightest movement made me wince. My sister left for her shift at 6:00, and promised to tape it up when she gets home in a few hours. My parents, as is their way, are simply leaving me alone. OK with me; I'm not in a particularly chatty mood at the moment. :c) 

Hopefully this will ease up a bit in a day or two. Having a high pain threshold may come in handy, since I have to move at least some of my boy clothes up here at some point this week. 

I don't know if transitioning will result in me being better coordinated, but I certainly hope so! In the meantime, my sister just sent a text message apologizing in advance for not having any pastel Ace bandages. Fortunately no one will be able to see, so I suppose I'll just have to live with that. ;c)

***

Here are a few modern rock-type videos that seem appropriate:

Oh, and since I mentioned it, here's Bruce and the boys with a tremendous live version of "Born To Run" from February 1975 as they were in the middle of the recording sessions for the album:

Damn... imagine hearing *that* live, months before the album was released?!?