My Dinner With M: The Sequel

Sunday, August 4, 2013

Greetings all! I hope everyone is enjoying their weekend.

I have a longer post in the works - a big one, too! - that I hope to finish later today, but first I wanted to write about my Saturday evening.

Did anything out of the ordinary happen?

No, not really.

And that is precisely why I want to write about it. :c)

My friend M - he of my most memorable coming-out tale and an inveterate smart ass like your humble blogstress - celebrated his birthday recently, so we decided to get together last night for a slightly belated celebration.

I've been on vacation all week, and have been living as myself the entire time, with two exceptions (which I prefer not to write about - nothing went wrong; they're simply private moments).

It's been wonderful, as you might imagine.

I am still amazed at how quickly being out as myself in public has become routine.

Less than a year ago I was unable to even tell a stylist that I was transitioning, let alone visit as myself.

Less than one month ago I had only gone out as myself to drive around, purchase gas, and go for short walks in the evening, after dark.

Now I have no trouble being out as myself, with no makeup on most occasions, and passing (as far as I can tell).

I spent last weekend at the Newport Folk Festival with M and my other friends T, J, and F.

But going to dinner with M was a bit different.

It was just the two of us.

I try not to take anything for granted, nor do I want to put other people in an uncomfortable position if I can avoid it.

So before I began to get ready to meet M, I sent him a message.

I explained that I planned to come as myself, but that I would understand completely if that made him uncomfortable in any way.

And I meant it.

I am well-aware that my transition affects others, and I try to be sensitive to that, particularly now that I present as myself regularly.

I sent the message, and then answered a text message from April.

When I glanced at my laptop again a moment a later, M had already replied.

"Come as you like. You are Cass now, after all."

"See you later. :c)"

Once again, I underestimated what great friends I have. :c)

Dinner itself was fine.

M was a bit, er, animated when I arrived lol, but once our food arrived he was the same old M.

M lived literally across the street from this restaurant for many years until moving last September.

We had visited together once before, in the spring, but I was in boy mode.

We had the same waitress who served us many times previously, but not since M had moved.

After taking our orders, she smiled.

"Nice to see you again," she said to M. "It's been a while. You haven't changed a bit."

Then she glanced at me with an even bigger smile.

"But I see that some of us have changed."

We chatted for a minute or so about my transition, then she left to place our order.

"I wonder if she recognized you because of me," M said.

"I'm sure of it," I replied.

"Really? How so?" asked M.

I grinned.

"Because she didn't recognize me the last two times I visited here as myself with other friends."

We both laughed.

"I can believe that," he said. "When I see you now, I still see him. Or at least I think I still do."

"But when I look at your transition pictures, I'm amazed by how much you've changed."

"Me too," I said. "As I said in that post, I only saw myself - really saw myself - very recently."

"It still feels weird to me at times," admitted M. "It's almost like you're disappearing forever."

"But then I figured out you're not. You're finally appearing, for the first time."

"We all keep commenting on how obviously happy you are now. That's great. So, really, what we're getting is an even better you."

"Thank you, M," I said.

"Besides, you're the only other person dumb enough to still laugh at my awful jokes."

"Consistency is a virtue, as I've always said," I replied.

"Thank God in this case. Otherwise I'd have to laugh at my own jokes, and tell more to fill the silence.  So you have to stick around for the sake of everyone."

It's nice to know I have a purpose in life now. :c)


I took a quick snapshot on my way out to dinner last night. This was moments before I nearly went head over heels down the stairs as I adjusted to my new sandals (yes, they're teal, in case you're wondering). But I survived none the worse for the wear, as you can see:

This received the April seal of approval, and so I duly posted it. (I like this one myself, mostly because I'm wearing a new dress.)


I thought I would post something from another Newport act that is new to me. In  this case, it's Hey Marseilles, from my former (and hopefully future) stomping grounds of Seattle:

I'll be picking up their new album soon, I hope!


bashashhazbaz on August 8, 2013 at 5:30 PM said...

sounds like a great date and you look lovely miss cassidy! nice to see you, even if only on here!

Cassidy on August 9, 2013 at 9:54 PM said...

Well, hello, stranger! :c) Nice to hear from you!

Thank you for the compliment! :#) That is very sweet of you.

I must note that we were *not* on a date, lest poor M be mortified for the rest of his life! lol Although the margarita may ensure he doesn't remember the evening anyway. :D

All joking aside, It *was* a fun evening, and it is wonderful beyond words to be out as myself - and for it to be completely normal. Life is good. :-p

== Cass

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